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Women Hold Up Half of the Sky The Chinese say that women hold up half of the sky. My wife, Barbara, goes one step further and claims that women hold up all of the men. No where is this more evident than at the town hall in Killingworth. First Selectman? I have a title and am not allowed to do anything. I am just a puppet and the women pull the strings. My secretary, Carol Gordon, won't allow me to open my mail or my e-mail. I am not permitted to issue a permit. Someone asked me for a dump sticker and Gina Rogolo, our Financial Officer, interceded. Doesn't trust me, I guess. Gina is always scolding me for not listening when she tries to explain budgets and benefits to me, and insists that I hold back with any "new ideas for the week." Can you imagine? They even have the audacity to complain when I track mud on the Karastan carpeting. These women are always straightening my desk, so I put a sign on my door "Keep out!" Then there is Ruth Patrick, the Tax Collector. I just about get my key out of the ignition and I can hear her sigh "He's here!" The first thing she greets me with is,"Are you staying out of trouble? I don't see any stab wounds on your back!" Jeannette Clegg, her assistant, offers candy to sweeten residents' dispositions when they pay their taxes. She keeps looking out of her window and makes sure that the candy jar is full when I pass by. The sanitarian's assistant, Irene DesJardins, brings me a copy of " Killingworth Today" every morning, and a count of the building permits. She too tries to sweeten me up with mints. Kathy Jefferson, our Zoning Enforcement Officer, checks with Irene to find out "what that CHARACTER is up to now." I rush by Holly Darin's office. She is the Judge of Probate and is always looking for new clients. I ain't ready! Linda Dudek and Sue Adinolfo, past and present Town Clerks, are like surrogate mothers to me. There is no dearth of advice from either of them. I always know in which corner to find Sue Fronte. I hope it's also my corner. I hear Donna Shanoff, the Assessor, undoubtedly in a hurry, as she gallops along, with all the new assessments in her head and the complaints that will undoubtedly accompany them. Think I'll buy stock in "Dunkin Doughnuts." Donna's assistant, Kathy Perry, always has a large cup of coffee. I hardly ever see Sheila Ahearn; she has her nose pointed to the computer. Wish I had Diane Gladstone's energy and was able to bound around as she does. Betty Dennis and Lauren Blaha, the town Registrars claim that they need a new computer. I NEED A NEW LIFE! While we are at it, don't let me forget the other alpha male amongst the women, namely the town's Sanitarian, Richard Leighton. He has the job that I would like when I grow up and the wardrobe that goes with it. Ladies, and you too, Dick, I want to thank you for keeping me hopping. Without you I'd be like a puppet with broken strings. Keep up the good work. You are wonderful! Sincerely, |
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